It’s that time of year again and I’m judging for the Kiss of Death Daphne du Maurier Awards for Excellence in Mystery/Suspense. I get to read unpublished works and published works and it absolutely reminds what to do and not do in my own writing. Some of the stories are so artfully crafted, the dialogue perfect, and others need some tweaks. I’m also reminded that I hate contrived scenes and plots.
I know what happens. The author has a fabulous scene the want to write…the baby NEEDS to be kidnapped – or whatever – so they make it happen. And there’s absolutely no reason the kidnapper wants the baby, or for the baby to be there, or for the caregiver to not notice and react to a kidnapper. It’s contrived. And it happens in traditionally published works, too. (I’m still traumatized by the totally illogical book that had the person under police protection because a sniper was trying to kill her and she went out onto the balcony of the safe house in the middle of the woods-providing excellent cover for a sniper-to READ. Not only putting herself in danger but also the officers protecting her as well. Basically, she deserved to die, but in reality the author knew there needed to be some kind of action scene and so they contrived it.) I hate contrived scenes.
I really hate contrived plots.
If you feel the need to have something happen and your character wouldn’t logically or believable do it, you’ve got to figure out what your character actually wants, meaning what’s their goal. Why do the want it? What’s their motivation? What do they risk if they don’t get it? What is stopping them from getting it? If your answers are a bit sketchy or illogical, please take a moment and TALK with your writer friends, your friends, your online community, and figure out WHY someone would feel the need to read a freaking book on a balcony when there is a sniper aiming for them. What will most likely happen is that you’ve got a great first (or second) draft, and ideas from others will help you figure out a better way to organically create the scene you want. Chances are you’ll have to skip the reading on the balcony scene because that gal is too stupid to live.
Lean into what they risk if they don’t attain their goal. There has to be a REALLY good reason for someone to want to change or even get off the couch. Seriously, if I didn’t need to pee, I’d probably never stand. We are biologically lazy, conserving energy, and it takes a lot of motivation to push for us to change. So, unless they are risking their life (because that’s the only time I’d run, and honestly after a few blocks I’m screwed anyway), their job, their reputation, their family/friends, something so integral to who they are as a person, they are most likely going to remain in the same state they’ve been living in.
Don’t make your characters’ actions become contrived scenes.
Talk to other writers. It can be online, no eye contact necessary, but get out there and ask the questions. For example, Why would someone carjack a car with a baby inside of it? I’m sure you’ve got some great reasons – leave them below. But honestly, if you are trying to hide from a killer, WTF would you read a book on a balcony? Hard nope from me. Have I ever done contrived a scene? Yes, as a new writer it was my favorite plot twist, a nonsensical action scene. But I’ve grown as a writer and I hope this helps you grow too 🙂
Want to meet me in person? I’m less salty in real life. Sheila and I have our Genre Conference this August 29-30th in Huntington. We’ve got 9 agents and editors taking pitches and some fabulous workshops too! Check out https://askigw.com/2025igwgenrecon/ for more details. I hope I get to see you there!
Love,
Tobi
PS Other things I hate – prologues that are actually scenes from later in the book. But that rant is for another day.
Intensive Genre Workshops 